I can't sleep last night as I was overly excited. My birthday is coming up (err.. actually it's like two and a half months away), and it's my big 2-5. So, I want to do something a bit different this time. You know - twenty five years old, quarter-life crisis, the need to do something larger than life, something to prove yourself. Besides, this would be the first time in ages I'd spend my birthday in Jakarta.

I was thinking, it might be a good idea to do something that I desperately would like to do for a long time, something that is a bit challenging. Going to Europe, though, is not an option. Hehe. Backpacking around the world is a tad expensive. Skydiving would be pretty sweet, but I don't really trust skydivers here in Jakarta or Indonesia as a whole (pardon me, I have not seen or heard enough to earn credibility). Bungy jumping is overrated and is not really my thing.

I was thinking about hiking! I'd like to hike at some point of time in my life, I just don't have the physique (and will for that matter) for it. I hate climbing hills! I remember my time in Wellington - people had to drag me down to town and cheat me not to take the taxi up. I'd be left far behind when we're climbing up the stairs and hills. I'd be breathless just taking up the stairs to the flat. I had to say no to any activities that requires an extensive walking uphill (unless there is absolutely no other way that I can dodge it). Yes yes, you past residents of 100 Kelburn Parade must be familiar with this.

So, I thought this decision is quite revolutionary. I don't know which mountain to hike though and who's coming with me (any takers?). Maybe Mount Bromo? I would LOVE to come back to New Zealand to do the Tongariro Crossing, but that has to wait for a wee while I reckon. From now til January - I'll be training for this. And that mountain has to be climbed before my 26th birthday in 2010!

What a random thing to keep me awake all night.

As a Chinese-Indonesian, I grew up with the Pribumi kids (indigenous people of Indonesia) at the back of my house calling me, "Cina, lu!" When translated into English - there is nothing wrong with it, they're calling me a Chinese. But it's probably as offensive as the word 'Nigger' in the US to call an African-American or the word 'Eskimo' in Canada to call the Inuit.

Well, I'm used to it. I'm here not to talk about inter-race relations or any of that sort. I want to rant about being different from other people.

Having different point of views, needs, wants and priorities. Girls at my age in my circle of friends, in my geographic region (discounting the AIESECers) would have either 1) Engagged or getting engaged 2) Married or getting married 3) Started their working lives 4) Pursuing their Masters degree. Normally, they'd still live with their parents in their parent's house but if they're married they will be with their husbands of course. There is nothing wrong with it obviously and it is completely normal.

But apparently.... what's not normal is at this age, having stayed overseas away from the family for reasons other than to study. Having graduated for a couple of years but working unpaid for an NGO. Wanting to go to the other side of the world leaving parents, friends and a comfortable life for traveling, seeing the world and leading a small, tough life on a shoestring budget.

Wow - surprise, surprise! Okay, I have to admit the last one does sound a bit weird. But isn't it what we called having a choice in life? Yes, I am different for wanting different things than 'normal' kids want and do. What is normal anyway? I say the definition is very subjective. You cannot possibly judge me not loving my family just because I want to go for an adventure, right? Give me a friggin' break!

People sacrifice different things in different forms for the things they love. You don't expect to get anything back when you sacrifice, ain't it? I can pull a perfect example of this out of my hat. Or is it just me who has altrustic mind a tad too much? But why now I feel I'm the selfish one just because I want to make a decision in my own life? Do I have to be a bit selfless? Or do someone need a parenting lesson?

Why can't we just respect each other's choice in life and be happy and merry and live in peace? I don't think it's a crime for wanting something different that other people want. My only crime is having seen the world and met people who opens my mind and worldview.

So, sue me.